Two Week Torture

This two week waiting period is nothing short of torturing! I can't believe a week has already gone by, and I have to wait another week! I promised myself I would not go crazy, and for the most part I've lived up to that, unless you had the luxury of being inside my head, and then you'd tell me that I failed miserably!

For example, on Easter I thought it was funny that I was getting a pimple on my chin, and then the following day, I got another one on my chin, and then on my nose, and another one on my nose that evening. Seriously? Pimples? I don't break out normally, which is why my attention was peaked, but since Tuesday I have no more pimples thus far.

Also, I feel like I have a lot of pressure in my lower abdomen. I have no idea if its gas or something else, but my digestion feels slow as well (since my surgery things go in, but don't come out as quickly).

Other than these small things, I have no other symptoms to speak of, other than my obsession. I promised J that I wouldn't take a pregnancy test until Tuesday (4/17), but it might just kill me a little to not take one on Sat/Sun.

The rational person that I am (sometimes), knows that whatever the outcome is, I have to view it as successful since post surgery, my ovulation changed by 6-7 days, (Day 13 vs Day 19). I feel somewhat normal in that regard, as well as the fact that my period has gone from 7 full days of bleeding and pain, to 5 days with minimal discomfort..... good thoughts.... and even knowing this I'm still thinking that I do not want to go through another BFN.....

Crossing fingers, arms, toes, to a BFP, because I'd like to know what that would feel like... PLUS, it doesn't help that H continues to draw little pictures of herself and her baby sister. She really wants a sister, J wants a little girl, and I'd like a little boy....H says she would love a boy too, but I try to tell her I have zero choice in the matter!

Here goes nothing... My only hope is that next week goes by quickly, and we will be celebrating shortly... and in the face of disappointment, I hope that I remind myself to be positive and take a breath.